The Sweeter Side of Goodbyes.

It's not ever really goodbye.

He always makes sure I know it's just, 'see you soon. Very soon. I promise'

I'm always the first to cry. The night before one of us leaves, I just look at him, and everything just wells up in my chest and I burst into tears. He holds me close, with my head buried in his chest, and he cries too, which makes me cry more.

It's hard, saying goodbye. The last night together; that moment our hands separate for the last time for a few weeks; It sucks. The first few days alone are probably the hardest. Getting used to not being able to see his face when I wake up, or feel him beside me while I'm sleeping. Not having him there to talk to or laugh with.

Slowly you start getting back into your old routine, and things get that little bit easier. You keep yourself as busy as you can and talk to each other as often as your schedules allow. Our best conversations are probably the ones just before we fall asleep, when there's no distractions to keep you from putting your phone down and not being able to respond a text for a couple of hours.

Sometimes we already know when we're going to see each other again, which makes saying goodbye just that little bit easier.

Sometimes the best visits have been when he makes little stopover trips. He catches a 6am flight and crawls into bed beside me by about 9am. One night and two days together. Usually we stay in bed all day and just talk. Sometimes I just look at him.

The excitement in the air when we finally have a date set to see each other, and flights booked, is like nothing else. We get so antsy waiting for the moment we can finally throw our arms around each other and spend a week forgetting that anything else exists.

So, the goodbye's aren't all bad. I think the worst part is the actual parting. That last glance; your hands breaking apart; trying to hold back tears when he kisses you on the forehead to keep you safe, and tells you he loves you.

I guess the sweeter side of goodbye is knowing that it's one goodbye closer to no more goodbyes at all.